While reading the series on pregnancy and infant loss at the R House, I remembered an experience that I had and I wanted to share it.
A really good friend and her husband told us that they were expecting just after our 2nd miscarriage. They had no clue about the miscarriage. However, after they found out, they sent me a bouquet of flowers and told me they were sorry for my loss. My friend later confided in me that she felt bad and that we didn't have to talk about her pregnancy at all again until I was ready. That was some major emotional support to me at that time and now I realize what a Christlike person she was for sacrificing the sharing of her joy to comfort me in my grief.
Most people are very well meaning and want to help. If you know of anyone who is going through a loss... any kind of loss, and you are not sure how to act or what to do, the worst thing you can do is ignore the feeling to help. Just acknowledge that they are hurting and do something nice for them. Maybe a phone call, sending a card, or even an email. Sending flowers, making them dinner or bringing them a yummy treat can be a huge hug to their soul.